Becoming a Mother...

has been a dream come true. It's amazing to think that six weeks have already gone by. It seems like a distant memory as I think of us in Illinois complaining because we couldn't come home quite yet. It seems like Christmas was a million years ago and it has always seemed like Kallen has been my flesh and blood. There are times I have forgotten that I didn't deliver him and I look for physical characteristics he might have from his father and then I take a step back and realize what a wonderful journey adoption has been for us. I can honestly say that your trials are but for a small moment! It has taken us eight years to be to this point and honestly I can't believe I'm here. But I am, it's what I prayed for, it's what I was blessed with.

I look at my sweet newborn son and marvel at our Heavenly Father's wondrous plan. To take in a baby with whom I never had nine months to get to know or deliver but LOVE with my whole being and more is a blessing beyond what I could have ever hoped for. Kallen truly is a breath of Heaven and I am so thankful my Heavenly Father has entrusted me with His precious child!

"For this child I prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of Him."

1 Sam 1:27

The Land of Lincoln and then home again!

So while we were in Illinois we had a hard time filling our time. Besides the fact that we had a newborn we also had some very chilly weather. Most days were a nice and balmy 10-12 degrees. And the snow did come. But there were some days where we just thought we'd go crazy so we got out and drove around to see the rural sites... not much to see, but it was nice to get out of the house. Oh, yes, this was the house we stayed in while we were there. The gracious Warner family, through church connections, let us stay in their home while they were holidaying in Florida so we had this large beauty to ourselves for about two weeks. When we arrived they had everything ready for us and for Kallen. From baby detergent and a crib to food and toiletries. It was so nice!This was our rural view from the front window of the Warner home. It really was quite beautiful. This was my favorite room in the whole house. This was the "do" everything room. I wanted to bring it home with me. This room in the basement was were we spent most of our time. Back to the left was our room and over to the right through the doors was were the big screen tv was. We spent our time watching tv on Scott's laptop. Kinda funny huh!This was the room we stayed in. It was very nice and ready for us when we arrived.

This is the video we made while Kallen was sleeping and during a very particularly boring period. Enjoy the isanity.

We watched all seasons of "The Office". We had never seen it before. The Office will always bring back memories of our time in Illinois.Taking care of my sweet babe. We were there long enough for his belly button to totally heal. Sleeping in together.The GPS saved our lives when it came to traveling through this foreign state. We didn't go anywhere without it. It was a dear traveling companion. Ready for church!

Scott and I chuckled at these streets signs. They were all backwards (the flags). Who made that mistake? Duh.The local grocery store. Scott and I called it Logi's. "Hey, can we go down to Logi's today to get some more diapers?" he heVisiting distance relatives for a sister in law. We were hoping to get some family history for our sister in law from a great aunt but came out an hour later with a full life story of a 90 year old woman who started smoking only 10 years earlier and came to the door to greet us with a knife in her hand. She had sent the family history in the mail a couple days before we arrived. But it was good to visit this old woman. She was very lonely. Too bad I didn't get a picture of Mary at the door with the knife, if I just had waited a few seconds more. :)Making dinner with the Warner family. They came home from their Florida trip on Jan. 7th. It was nice to meet them and spend time with them. They are an amazing family. Us with the Warner family.

Coming home was quite the adventure just as getting there was. We had tickets to fly out Wednesday Jan. 14th but we knew a horrible blizzard was coming in and the chance of us getting home on Wednesday or even Thursday was slim and we were getting very anxious to get home. We were still waiting for our paperwork to get through to Utah and back and we hadn't heard about the status since the Friday before. Tuesday morning Scott made some calls to the state of Illinois and found out that they had overnighted paperwork to Utah and that they should have it by now. Scott emailed the state of Utah asking for a phone call when the paperwork had been processed. He explained the weather situation and our plan to hopefully get out today. On a feeling Scott turned to me and said, "Pack up, let's go home." He changed our flight from Wednesday to that night at 7:00. We said good bye to the Warners and we were on our way to Chicago without a word from either state. We were going on faith and praying we got the call to leave as we were on our way to the airport. As we stopped half way through our journey for gas we got a call from the state of Utah stating they had recieved the paperwork and we were good to go. We now just had to wait for the call from Illinois. 20 min. later we got that call from Illinois that we were good to go through them and all we could do was cry. We were finally coming home and with our new son in tow. The flight was easy, Kallen was a gem and we arrived home at 10:00 pm. with a house full of neighbors, friends and family. Even our Bishop and his wife were there. It was so wonderful to be home after being away for almost three weeks. Kallen will always know what an amazing homecoming he had. He is one loved little man! The Banner was courtesy of my Young Women. (My dad took pictures of the night before. All we had was this picture of the leftovers from the morning after.)

Grandma's glad we're home!

It's about time

So it's about time we finally posted!

It all started on Friday the 26th. We left for Chicago at 8:30am. Our flight was delayed by an hour and we had a connecting flight in St. Louis from there we were to fly into Chicago no sweat...but wait, there was a catch. Chicago was foggy and the airport had shut down so after circling the city for an hour they diverted our flight to Cleveland, OH. After again circling for 20 min they again informed us that they were diverting our flight to Pittsburgh, PA. since the Cleveland airport was full. Needless to say, after 4 hours of sleep in a very cheep motel and finally catching another plane the next morning we finally made it to Chicago. As soon as we landed though they closed the airport again because of the fog. It was a miracle we finally got there. So we arrived at the Rockford Memorial Hosp. in the rain and fog on Saturday the 27th at around 11:30. This is when we finally got to meet our Angel. (We'll call her C for anonymity sake)

C and her parents were in the hospital room when we arrived. We brought her a gift and this was what broke the ice for us. From there we just talked about families and hobbies and what the plans were over the next couple of days. C had been on petosin(?) for over 27 hours and had only dilated 1 cm the dr's suggested doing a c-section. C was all for it! the C-section was scheduled for 7:30 that night.

At 7:30 C and her mom were taken into the delivery room (C's mom took Scott's camera in with her) while C's dad, me and Scott waited outside the delivery room. At 7:56 our little Kallen was born. As soon as they wheeled him out we were there to greet him. I cried. This is my son.

Scott and I watched as the nurse weighed and measured him.

7lbs. 14 oz.

and 19 1/2 inches long. We just watched for a whole two hours as they did all the necessary test. It was awesome.

Kallen being fed for the first time. Isn't he a cutie!

Finally holding him at 11:00pm. Man was the wait worth it!

On Sunday we got to come and visit for another couple of hours. This time I got to feed him.This is Bishop Call. He's C's Bishop and he's been so amazing and helpful to us. He's the one who helped us find a place to stay while we are here in IL. He's been a very good Bishop and friend to C. She loves him very much.C's last time feeding Kallen. After this we both broke down. C is our Angel and she gave us the best gift anyone could've ever given us. We love you C!

Back at the house with Kallen.

Isn't he just perfect? We think so. We love him to pieces. We are anxious to finally get back home. We still have some paperwork to finalize and as soon as that gets done we will be on our way back to Utah with our son. Till then we are both taking on our mommy and daddy responsibilities. We both get up at night to take care of the wonder that is our son! We feel very blessed and as I had mentioned in my last post we have seen His hands in all things!

His hand in all things

When I was little, the thought of being a mom was ever present. In helping care for my other siblings and babysitting younger children in my neighborhood allowed me to form my view and excitement for the day when that would be my role. In Young Women’s you learn and prepare for that as well. Every aspect of growing up as a girl and as young women, in the church, is in preparation for and in helping rear the next generation as a married adult. When that day never came I questioned my worth and all my faults. Year after year and doctor after doctor I was getting tired and weary. Scott, I’m sure, was getting tired of my fanatical melt downs, although he was ever sweet and comforting. I knew I needed to keep my faith and knew that the Lord has His hands in all things. I had seen the evidence of that in my life in the past and I knew in the back of my mind that it was sill true now. I remember getting a call from a brother in law announcing the anticipated arrival of their fourth child, a call from a friend later that week who was expecting her third, and paperwork left and right from our agency letting us know we had forgotten a few things to fill out here and there. I was through! I was spent and past weary. I had a broken spirit and asked the Lord to take this burden away from me; I couldn’t carry it any longer. It was affecting my attitude and my daily life. I pleaded more for that relief then for anything else in my life. This was in June.

August 28th was our first email from our birth mom. You cannot believe the utter excitement we experienced as we continued our correspondence back and forth with this beautiful young woman, our Angel! The Lord had heard my prayer for relief and was granting me a season of joy. On the days we didn’t hear back from our Angel was agony. Not knowing her thoughts or how she felt about us ate me up. At times it was more agonizing then at other times. These were the times that the Lord allowed me to reflect on how hard this must be for our birth mom! She was making some very important and difficult decisions in her life at that moment and I needed to be aware and sensitive to her situation. At this time we weren’t even sure if she was going to pick us to be her baby’s parents. We continued our correspondence……

September 23rd was life changing for us. We received a beautiful email from our Angel asking us if we would be her baby’s parents. She wanted to make sure her baby had both a mom and a dad who would rear him in the Gospel and she knew we were the ones to take on that task…Forever! Again, tears flowed freely but this time these were tears of joy! We continued our correspondence. …

On December 26th we take off to Chicago for the arrival of our baby boy! Throughout this new, exciting, agonizing, terrifying, and most anticipated life changing ordeal we have seen the Lords hand guiding us through. We know He will continue to do so and throughout the rest of our life.

Merry Christmas!

I've been photo tagged!

Rules of this tag are you have to take a picture of these seven things, no cleaning or straightening, just click and take a pic right then and there! So here I go.....

1. My favorite Room: I love my Kitchen! I love to cook, watch tv, and entertain family and friends in this room.

I also included another room that I'm sure I'll spend a lot of time in and love!

2. My Bedroom:
Pretty pathetic huh. Since Scott and I are usually the ones who frequent this room it's been the one neglected the most! Nothing matches and oh, look.....I haven't even had time to fold the laundry. The Superman blanket is to keep me warm at night. Scott thinks keeping the house cold helps us sleep better. He's right. I sleep like a baby every night!!! Anyway, here's my bedroom.


3. My Bathroom sink:Can you guess which one I really use? Yes,...it's the old, non remolded, brown, old, crusty one. I had to include our nice one to prove that I keep one of them clean.


4. My favorite shoes:My hiking shoes, my slippers, and my favorite flips from my favorite place in the world! I can't live without these babies.


5. My side of the closet:
Again, my room is pathetic. The closet space is really terrible....look at those shoes. If you notice some of my clothes have creeped slowly into Scott's side of the closet.


6. My child and what he/she is doing:
Just waiting to be born.

7. Picture of me:

I really couldn't bring myself to take a picture of myself at this moment

so Scott picked this one out.

If you want to play...I'd love to see your quick click pic's!!!

Soon to be......

You'll have to wait for details!

The Gorgeous Young Man

Today I went to the bank on my lunch break. I wanted to cash a few checks I received from doing hair. I pulled up to the drive thru and noticed that all the registers were full. I pulled up behind the closest line and waited for the cars in front of me to finish there transactions. I was parked far enough away from the suburban in front of me so I could move into the next line just in case the car to the right moved from their register first.
I sat there for almost 15 min. WAITING. Then I thought, “Just move behind the next car, he looks like he’s winding down with his transaction…..No, just wait here. If you move then the suburban in front of you will then be the one that moves first.” (It always happens that way)
So I stayed put, and just as the car to my left was about to pick up his money from the register a silver sports car pulled up to the side of me just as he was about to leave and then pulled into his spot. “DANG IT!!! I should have moved!” I was getting pretty antsy, even mad! The suburban in front of me was obviously having some issues with some money thing and so I moved into the next spot behind the silver sports car. Just as I moved from behind the suburban a silver van pulled into my previous spot. That’s when the suburban in front of the van finally moved and the silver van moved freely into the space I SHOULD'VE HAD!!!! AAAAAHHHHH! Then the words just came rolling off my tongue…“Son of a BIT*#!!!! I was furious!
It finally became my turn. I pulled up to the register, ripped the canister from the register and shoved my checks and ID into it. A few minutes later a nice, manly voice came over the speaker and asked if I wanted these checks cashed. “Yes, PLEASE.” (DUH) as I looked at him through the window with my eyes a blaze with fury. It didn’t matter that he was drop dead gorgeous. He worked for the bank and I was mad at the bank and everyone around me for coming to the bank!
“No problem that will be out in a minute for you.”
I half heartedly snipped out the word; “Thanks”
About 30 seconds later I could hear the canister coming back through the tube to my register. As I pulled out the canister I counted my money, made sure my ID was in check and then noticed a receipt with the phrase, “GO COUGARS!” written in blue marker. The gorgeous young man noticed my BYU hat I was wearing. I looked up at him and he was smiling at me with that beautiful smile giving me the thumbs up.
And that was it! My demeanor toward all those who had un-fairly finished their transactions before me there in the drive thru, and those who worked at the bank was gone! That small, insignificant gesture on his part was huge for me…..and I started to cry! (I guess that can give you a clue to how crazy this week has been…I mean, to cry over that, COME ON!!)
It’s been times like these that make me aware that I have the same obligation to treat others the same way this gorgeous young man did me. He totally affected the rest of my day (and not because he was gorgeous, ok, maybe a little) and with just a simple gesture. Thanks gorgeous young man for that wonderful lesson!!!!

It’s a good thing Scott wasn’t with me when this all took place. He wouldn’t have been too pleased with my foul mouth. ;)

October in a nutshell

The month of October came and went! It's amazing to think that Thanksgiving and Christmas are just around the corner...no wait, the way time is flying they are at the corner. Oh, wait....I can see it coming closer then where the corner is..... THE HOLIDAY'S ARE COMING!
Anyway, I thought since I haven't posted in a while I thought I would post some pics of our October events. Here it goes.

We celebrated my mother-in-laws Birthday! It was a momentous occasion and so thanks to Tom (my father in law) we celebrated in style. Happy Birthday Karen!

Limo ride for a night out on the town.

We enjoyed the view from the Garden Restaurant.

They even opened the roof for a few minutes.

The dining was yummy and stylish.Scott mixing the drinks. Martinelli with Martinelli. We called the mix, "The Martinelli"! Taking one last pose in front of the Limo. It was a great night out!Our ward Halloween carnival this year was a HIT!!! It was sponsored by the youth and everyone had a great time!If you don't know who this is then you need to go out and buy Guitar Hero! Cam won for best child costume! Gotta love this kid!Carving pumpkins with our favorite neighbors!The executives hamming it up at work! Anyone remember the movie Nacho Libre?Ghostbusters!

This was by far the best. Go Cody!

Hope October was as good a month for you as it was for us!